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Planning a wedding is a lot of hard work.  Often, a tremendous amount of time is placed on finding the right vendors, who are available on your date, and at the right price (hey, even millionaires have a budget!).  The chosen locations for getting ready, the ceremony, and reception will often dictate the timeline for the day.  But there is one option that couples often don’t give enough consideration and it can have a powerful impact on the timing and fun of the wedding day: the First Look.

Even if you aren’t familiar with the phrase, you probably already know what it is.  A First Look is where it is arranged for the bride & groom to see one another and have a special moment together before the ceremony.  Typically, your awesome photographer can help choose an ideal location (Photographers are cool! Touch their hair!). And the way it works is the bride or groom approaches the other from behind, and they face one another. Then they share a private moment together (the photographers and/or video are at a reasonable distance, but everyone else should be elsewhere).  After that, the couple can relax and have fun! They can make some beautiful bride and groom portraits and do some shots with their bridal party. They can even travel to other locations for fun & photos. That’s not the only advantage however.

Many couples want to be ”traditional” and not see each other before the ceremony, and it’s fine to do that.  It’s always possible to shoot  solo portraits of the bride or groom and them with their respective parties prior to the ceremony.  The downside of the traditional route is nearly all of the portraits have to be taken after the ceremony and before the reception.  What sometimes happens is what we call ”picture fatigue”.  It seems to wear down grooms before anyone else (No, I don’t know where the beer is, I’m just there to take pictures). But, most couples feel a pressure to get to the reception and not keep their guests waiting, even if they keep to their predetermined timeline, and so they don’t relax or enjoy themselves as much as they could.

Brides often say they want to be traditional and not see each other, because they want a photo of his expression when he sees her coming down the aisle. Even with a First Look, the groom still gets emotional when he sees his bride coming down the aisle. How can he not?  You get so many great photos with a First Look that you can only get with a First Look.  You get to embrace and talk and have fun! Doing it the traditional way is almost like seeing each other for the first time and acting like you just met (the bride and groom typically don’t get to talk or hug much at the start of the ceremony, although they do exchange warm looks usually).

The First Look can change the planning for the day because it allows more portraits to be done before the ceremony. It breaks up the photo-taking so it doesn’t have to be like one long after-ceremony photo-session. Couples find themselves more relaxed and having more fun on their wedding day. Not to mention, you get some kickass pics of seeing one another for the First Look.  If you really want to enjoy the day, you can do a First Look and then go do fun activities with your bridal party for however long you want before the ceremony. You can rent a trolley and hop all over town or go to a pub.  You could even start a soccer league for pets, if that’s your thing.  Whatever might be your definition of ”good times”.  The time is yours… together.

Benefits of doing a First Look:

* You get to spend more time together on your wedding day as a couple.

* The family formals can be shot before the ceremony. Or you can shoot some before and some after.  It doesn’t have be one big photo session after the ceremony. ​

​* You don’t have to keep your guests waiting as long after the ceremony before the reception starts. Or you can keep them waiting and use this time for something exciting, instead of dividing the time between  just doing family formals and bride and groom portraits.

* The First Look gives you great pictures of the two of you sharing a real moment, generally in a specially-selected location.  Who doesn’t like touching moments in a great location?

* You are more relaxed after the First Look and enjoy your wedding day longer.

* After the First Look, you can travel around and do fun things with the whole wedding party without the pressure of having to get to the reception right away.

* Otherwise the bride and groom portraits are the last photos to be taken and sometimes the couple is tired and hungry and would rather just go to the reception, not giving their all for some of the most important pictures of their lives!

* You are more likely to become rich and famous (unconfirmed)!

* You are more likely to end up in our portfolio because the pictures rock (yeah, that’s confirmed)!

Ultimately, it’s your wedding and your decision.  You can choose to be traditional if you prefer to just be traditional. Lots of couples go that route.  Increasingly, however, couples are seeing the value in doing a First Look.  You get some awesome photos and extra time together.  But, it’s up to you.  Whatever you choose, please keep this in mind while you outline your day:

Don’t just plan your wedding day; plan on experiencing it!

You can see Morgan & Matt’s First Look and following bride and groom shots on our blog here.

You can see Whitney & Casey’s Fist Look and following bride and groom shots on our blog here.

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What’s the most touching thing you’ve ever seen? That’s an easy one.  The most touching thing I’ve ever seen was a baby bunny about to be hit by a furniture truck, but a baby pushed it out of the way at almost the last second. And then a puppy pushed the baby out of the way. Just before the truck could hit the puppy, it blew a tire and spun off of the road and hit a mime.  It was absolutely the most touching and beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Wait. How can that be so when a mime was hit, you ask?  Haha. Seriously. It was a mime; mimes are gross.

Okay. Maybe that never actually happened. And you probably don’t think it would be so much touching, as it would be frightening. So, maybe we aren’t entirely on the same sheet of music when it comes to bunnies, danger, and mimes. Well, maybe we are.  But, the other day, I was shopping for gifts and trying to think of some great gift ideas.  Not just things that cost money. Those aren’t great gifts. It feels good to give someone you love something that has real value of an emotional kind (although the Lexus commercials on TV seem to think making a $40k purchase without consulting your spouse is touching).  But I was thinking about really specials gifts and the precious moments giving them creates.

Well, thinking of precious moments like that got me thinking about other peoples’ precious moments.  As a wedding photographer, you have the privilege of witnessing so many special moments people share.  And since it was so close to Christmas, I started thinking about awesome gifts people have given to each other at weddings.  So, I thought about a lot of cool gifts brides and grooms have given each other. And this being a blog for our photography business, I thought maybe, as a gift to you, I might take the time to share a few of those.  Here are a couple precious gifts from weddings we’ve shared.

The Book

This year, we were honored to attend and provide coverage for Caitlin and Quincy’s wedding. They had a lot of emotion and happy tears throughout the day (we are big fans of blubbering around here).  Caitlin’s gift to Quincy was special and touched him deeply. She gave him a painting of the view from a window of what I believed to be their house in Florida (Quincy was emotional when he opened it, so I didn’t pry too hard, since I like to document and not play Sherlock Holmes).  So, wherever they go the rest of their lives, whatever significance that window and view had for them, they will always be able to remember it.  I liked that gift, but it isn’t the one I am writing about. Or wait. I think I did just write about it.  Well, I guess it’s better that way, since it was a cool gift.

Quincy’s gift to Caitlin was unique as well.  He gave her a book, which contained a very sweet letter to her.  The rest of the book was blank.  The idea is that they are supposed to write the story of their life in the book, as it happens, so when they are old, they can look back and read ‘the greatest love story ever told’.  Ambitious? Yeah, and that’s good.  It was a pretty powerful and sweet gift.  Fellas, it had all the ladies emotional.  I’m just sayin’.  Writing the greatest love story ever told is a pretty cool gift!

The Song

Lynsey and Caleb’s wedding is displayed in a sample album in our studio.  So, obviously, we really liked them and their wedding was great.  They had a lot of great moments.  During consultations, while showing our sample album, I like to point out to grooms that Caleb wrote Lynsey a song and sang it to her at the reception. Yeah, that’s right. The bar for gifts is way up there now.  That’s something that might seem embarrassing to some people, maybe. But, looking back, it would have to be one the sweetest things ever. Without being a very impressionable groupie, it’s hard to get a song written about your relationship, much less sang to you. Especially in this economy. So, Caleb writing and singing a song to Lynsey was one of the coolest gifts we’ve seen.

The Letters

The last cool gift I want to talk about hasn’t actually fully happened yet.  We photographed Ashley and John’s wedding earlier this year. So, that much happened already. They are a great couple and they had a fantastic wedding.  It was during the wedding that they set up this cool gift.  During their ceremony, they sealed a box which contained a bottle of wine and a letter that each had written to the other. On their fifth anniversary, they are supposed to open the box, drink the wine, and read the letters.  I haven’t finished my time machine (it’s still in the planning stages, unless my future self *hint hint* wants to drop me a few details), so I can’t say how special that moment was/will be.  But, I think the idea is awesome and I’m certain day they open that box will be very special.  I love my wife and wine and letters, so I wish we had done this at our own wedding!

We’ve had lots of other cool gifts exchanged at weddings and it was hard to pick just a few for this post.  Planning a wedding is a lot of work and stress, and many couples have jobs or school on top of that, so I know it can be very difficult to find the time to come up  with and deliver a great gift idea.  And that’s why it’s okay to cheat and steal the ideas from blogs! I’m mostly kidding. Enjoy the Holidays!

- Shane

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